I realized that we are long overdue on an update. So without further ado....
The update is…there really isn’t
much to update. We are still waiting.
We have been on the waitlist for
21 months now. It has been 10 months since were matched, 7 since the revocation
and we are sitting at number 17 (officially) on the waitlist. We started around number 57 and in that time, we
have been matched twice, met one birth mother, and had to make two decisions
regarding whether our profile would be shown to a potential birth mother (we
declined both times). We haven’t moved up (or down?) the waitlist in 2 months
and it can be and is discouraging. It isn't as if we are waiting for a
random number to be called or to get to #1 (I hope we don’t make it to #1)…we
are waiting for a birth mom/birthparents to choose us. To like us. It can
be horribly hard to place this kind of hope in a stranger, to like you enough
off a set of pictures and write ups and references and think you are
“qualified” to parent their child. I am discouraged and frustrated but
know that this is part of the process and we knew this going in. Still. It is
hard to not imagine what this Christmas *should* have been like this year.
I am the pessimistic one, which I
know isn't really a surprise! I told Mick that if we are still on the
list at the two year mark, which is in February, we will be getting another
puppy. I figure that if we have another puppy who needs to go out in the middle
of the night and dealing with the training and busyness of a dog, we will get
matched with a newborn and our hands will be stressfully busier! Call it
Murphy’s Law. I’m putting all my hope in crazy Murphy!
We had started our international
paperwork but have decided to put that on hold. We have completed the
international home study and reference checks and are awaiting final approval
from the Alberta Government. The next step after we get approved would be to
sign the contract and start to collect our dossier documents for our Manitoba
agency. We have to use two agencies as our Alberta agency doesn't facilitate
international adoptions so we have to double up. (Also, see link for
information on what is a dossier and what goes into it http://international.adoption.com/foreign/dossier.html)
However, we have decided to put this next step on hold. While we knew that
adoption, both domestic and international, were not inexpensive, we were shocked
at the amount of the first payment installment (think…a decent used car). And we
just don’t have that kind of money lying around, while still having a few fees
to pay once matched in regards to the domestic. So…we are on hold - for the
time being.
So we continue to wait and make
plans and hope that we’ll have to cancel those plans because we’ll have a
kidlet by that time. Both Mick and I have part time jobs to try to pay down our
debt load and still save for adoption expenses and the loss of income during a
parental leave all while trying to have some sort of a life. Juggling our schedules and being an adult is hard work!
So in the meantime, I’m perusing dog breeds on Pinterest and picking out puppy names :) Anything to kill the time, right?
